Today was actually a really good day for sleep.
Hey guys, did we not have class today?
Most coffee from a communal office pot tastes about the same. But I appreciate the special clarity that comes after you’ve poured out the last lukewarm dregs, sometime around 11 AM when it’s really too late to make another pot, and not even some clumpy non-dairy creamer can distract you from the bitterness of where your caffeine addiction has led you.
Baths are possibly even less productive than showers because they create the illusion that you don’t have work to do. Why else would you be taking a bath?
How I looked for most of today.
A 24-hour delivery service that brings a 2 Liter Diet Coke and a pint of Ben and Jerry’s right to your door. I would literally pay anything for this. Gold, jewels, literally anything. Like teeth. I would pay in teeth. Or bits of my soul. Seal pelts. A vial of hummingbird tears. Souls of the undead. Childhood memories. The One Ring. Bitcoin.
Sometimes when I need to study late at night I will convince myself that I will be more productive after I have had a shower. This has never worked.
It actually didn’t work. Also it’s 2 AM. Why is it 2 AM?
Sometimes experiments work for no reason. The confused joy that follows is almost more terrible than if it hadn’t worked at all.
I went to the lab, where I learned my DNA preps might be no good. I’m sad now. Also, I’m missing Game of Thrones. So I’m even more sad. The end.